Memoir Chapter

[Memoir Chapter] Why Do I Like Jesse Eisenberg?

Geesh, that title sounds like it’s more common to unlike him. That is probably not the case, speaking from personal experience most people don’t even know who he is by name when I mention him. I have to list characters in movies he’s portrayed, and sometimes (more often than I’d like to admit) I have to correct them when they confuse him for Michael Cera. Which brings up a valid question: If most people I’ve talked to about Jesse Eisenberg can’t tell him and Michael Cera apart, why do I find that comparison an annoyance and why do I have little to no interest in Michael Cera’s endeavours?

My boyfriend says he knows why I like him. He also relentlessly harasses me for my intrigue into him, which I don’t think peaks his jealousy as much as his confusion as to why it’s Jesse Eisenberg. At dinner the other night, upon realizing that Jesse has written plays and has a new book coming out this week and I was very excited to check them out, my boyfriend said some smart-ass quip and I was quick to point a finger at him from across the table and boldly state (without so much of a raised voice, but a very deep stare) that Jesse was now considered holy terrain in our relationship and he was now required to “back off” of teasing me about him. Not because I feel like Jesse would be offended or anything, but because I was thoroughly annoyed with people, especially someone I love dearly and respect, not seeing what I see. My boyfriend says I like Jesse because he plays characters I relate to, and that his nervous qualities reflect my own traits of anxiety. This is what triggered my post. Is that why I like Jesse? Because I narcissistically see myself in him?

Granted, there’s not much comparison between us. If you out the two of us together and had our resumes out, I assure you it would take a good few minutes to find one thing you could see in common. I don’t dream of a world where I marry him. I don’t even know the guy. I met him once during a promotional event in San Francisco where he and Aziz Ansari served us pizza. I took a photo with him and I think I nervously held his hand, which is kind of embarrassing as I’m sure no person wants to hold hands with some blue-haired girl they just met as part of their media tour. Anyway, I never met him again after that, so I don’t really have much of an opinion of him other than movies I’ve seen. I don’t really pay attention to his interviews. I did see what he said about San Diego Comic Con and how turned off by it he was. As a frequent attendee of the event, I know exactly what he’s talking about. My friend Skylar titled SDCC “Self-Entitled and Privileged Con” after his first visit this year, and I can’t say he’s wrong to describe it that way.

Honestly, I think the reason I like Jesse is because I enjoy watching him. I enjoy his facial expressions, his voice, his acting. He seems like a normal guy that has stories to tell. Stories that I’m interested in hearing. Maybe that is because I see myself in parts of him, because often I’ve found that the things that interest us can sometimes be a sort of mirror into ourselves. I’m a nervous mumbler and a fast talker that tilts my head and purses my lips in confusion or in contemplative moments. I guess that’s the one thing we have in common. Oh, and I also think you have to be crazy to be comfortable at SDCC.

Clothing Fashion Shopping Trends

[Fashion] Disturbia, My New Favorite Online Store

I found this gem of a clothing website, Disturbia, after a friend of mine admitted his jealousy of not being able to wear this Necronomicon bathing suit top:

Let's summon the beasts from deep beneath the deep blue with this hot top.
Let’s summon the beasts from the deep blue with this Lovecraftian top.
And that is just the beginning of the must-haves!  A perfect hybrid of goth and 90’s grunge, Disturbia has everything I ever wanted to wear during my transition from awkward 6th grader to full fledge alterna-chick (which happened in the 90’s…). My favorite include:

This Nirvana inspired 90's slogan dress.
This Nirvana inspired 90’s slogan dress.

I seriously doubt my ability to live life without this Wednesday Dress.
I seriously doubt my ability to live life without this Wednesday Dress.
I can’t stop browsing through the website. It’s awesome. I love all of it. Too bad it’s in the UK and somewhat expensive to own. One dress on sale is going to cost about $60 to get to me… and you know, now that I’m thinking about it, it’s really not that expensive. Hmm…

Audio Entertainment Events Live Show Podcast

[Events] Welcome to Night Vale Live at The Orpheum in Los Angeles 4/18/15

Hello, Listeners...
Hello, Listeners…

I listen to Welcome to Night Vale, the splendidly morbid podcast that provides community updates and news from the absurd little fictional town Night Vale, at night before I go to sleep. Some episodes make it quite difficult to go to sleep to, such as The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives in My Home whispering quietly about how she’s always in the corner of my vision, barely out of sight. Yet, night after night I lie in bed, shrouded in darkness, listening to Cecil Palmer go on about the Event Calendar, various updates on local businesses, city politics, etc. It’s very sweet, yet dark and twisted, and my favorite podcast ever.

As the date for the live appearance approached, I was actually somewhat concerned that it would be different. Well, obviously seeing live actors perform instead of just hearing their faceless voices in your room at night is different. I guess I was more concerned with being distracted by actors, or maybe that having my eyes open wouldn’t have the same effect as lying down in my bed with my eyes closed. Silly concerns, I now know. Though I had seriously considered bringing a sleep mask.

As the actors appeared and lent their voices to the stage, it wasn’t distracting. These voices had become familiar, and their actor’s bodies were barely a focus. They didn’t distract, it was as if they were there just vessels to project the real star: The voice. Now, these actors are tremendously talented. Cecil Baldwin practically moved the crowd to tears with an emotional projected monologue that closed the show. Such tremendous power in a voice.

But if you were hesitant to see Night Vale performed live, I’m here to assure you that it’s just as great as listening to it at home, if not better. You feel more like a citizen of Night Vale. You are referred to as one. And it’s amazing that a podcast that I felt I was eavesdropping on, you know, listening to the community radio station of a town I was looking in on, now feels like I’m a part of. And aren’t we? Are we not the listeners of Night Vale Community Radio? And is community radio not meant for its community? Such a simple concept, but it feels welcoming nonetheless. The listeners of Night Vale are the people of Night Vale, and seeing your community radio broadcast live with other members of your community, ones you never met, ones you didn’t know existed, well, that’s just special, isn’t it?

Clothing Fashion Film

[Fashion] DROPDEAD Gremlins Collection


I love pop culture references in my wardrobe. I own so many Disney movie still tops it’s a bit ridiculous and I’ve had to give some of them away or I’d only ever wear Ariel’s face on my chest. My biggest peeve about having pieces that represent my fandom is that they are usually T-Shirts or hoodies and they get tired. Sometimes I don’t want to wear jeans and a tee, you know? This Gremlins collection by Dropdead has a few tees, but they also have great prints in button-up shirts! Seriously! A Gizmo printed tunic style button up top?! Love it. This is probably the best pop-culture fashion mash-up I’ve seen so far this year.

Art Hot Goths

[Art] Erinye by Ray Fawkes

Ray Fawkes

You like art? You like gothy ladies painted beautifully out of watercolors? Then I think you should buy this. I assure you I will be forever jealous.

Clothing Fashion Product Review Shopping Trends

[Fashion] Custom Made Leggings by Dame Fatale


Though leggings would seem like a well fitted item when purchased at any store ever, they are not. When I wear a size small legging, my butt stretches them to the point that they feel like they’re falling down and I’m consistently pulling them up. Also, muffin top! A size medium is baggy under the knees and roomy in the waist. For the affordable price of less than a pair of Splendid leggings at Bloomingdale’s, I had a pair made specifically for me by Dame Fatale! High waisted and perfect! If you wear leggings 3-5 times a week like me, I strongly suggest getting a pair made to your exact measurements. Also, check out her Pac Man hair bows.

Memoir Chapter Reflection

[Reflection] The Year Behind and The Year Ahead

January 2014: Why didn't I buy this dress?! I mean, damn! Right?!
January 2014: Why didn’t I buy this dress?! I mean, damn! Right?!

I started this year cold, confused and awkwardly optimistic in San Francisco. I had found solace and warmth in the Cat Club of Soma. You could find me there at least three nights a week, most likely at the back bar. I had a place in the world, and it was magical and special. I had a new job, my roommate was the most amazing one you could ever hope to have (mostly because she is my soul-mate) and I was more than content with my life. Somewhat.

My soul-roomie, Holly.
Me and my soul-roomie, Holly.

Around the beginning of summer I started to get restless. What did I want? What was my next challenge? And could I afford to really change anything while living in San Francisco? I love that City with all my heart, and a part of me will never leave that city though my body may. However, it was ridiculously expensive and once you had found your stride in the lifestyle that could afford to live there, you were pretty much stuck. I couldn’t afford to move anywhere since the rates were tripling before my eyes and my landlord was really putting the pressure on me to GTFO. I was panicked and stressed, and then I lost my job.

Lost my job. Maybe they hated my hair?
Lost my job. Maybe they hated my hair?

I would like to state for the record, I had done nothing wrong to lose my job. That’s my ego checking in. But honestly, I had no write-ups, no formal or informal warnings, no one ever said I needed to improve or do something differently or better. So I was shocked to be let go. I had worked for a prestigious company for several years prior and never once came close to losing my job, so this was a shock. I’m assuming it was my eccentricities that unsettled the very low-diversity establishment.

Fortune from Maia.
Fortune from Maia.

I had no idea what to do next, but then I kind of did. I had planned to move back to Southern California by January of 2015. This was the push to do it sooner. So I did. And before I did, I decided this was the time to start a new career. In October of 2014, just a month after moving back down the coast, I started Cosmetology school: Now I would become a licensed professional. Hooray! Though I do miss the fashion industry, I know in the future I will be able to merge both into a flourishing career. Or not. But whatever. I’ll be fine.

Be jelly of my Baymax and incredible style.

So by the end of my year I’ve moved 600 miles away, became a full-time student, and routinely (and I mean, like a routine. Like all the time) visit Disneyland Parks. I miss San Francisco so deeply, but going to Cosmetology School out there was a joke. It was more affordable in Orange County. And I can always move back, though I would miss the Disneyland churros all over again.

My new friends.
My new friends.

As for the year ahead, I want to graduate with straight A’s and get my license quickly after. Then, I’m not sure. I’d like to keep taking classes, learning new things, work on this site more, maybe learn CSS coding so this looks less like a template (it is)! And play more South Park: The Stick of Truth video game, though I’ve already put in 24 hours in a mere three days.

Me, currently at the end of 2014.
Me, currently at the end of 2014.

[Hair] I’m Old But My Hair Doesn’t Know It Yet

In a mere 3 days, I will be celebrating my birthday. In honor of being old, I dyed my hair red because I wanted to look like Ariel when 29 comes to slap me in the mouth on Monday.

Red hair, don't care.
Red hair, don’t care.
Disney Halloween

[Halloween] My Marc Davis Inspired Costume for 2014

Comparison photo of the original portrait and my costume.
Comparison photo of the original portrait and my costume.

For Mickey’s Halloween Party at Disneyland, I decided to pay tribute to my favorite Disney Legend by designing my costume after one of his original changing portraits. Unfortunately, this design was removed in the 2005 refurbishment, but never forget!

You can also see the original concept design at the Walt Disney Family Museum in San Francisco at their Marc Davis exhibit until November 3rd. I will warn you, the exhibit is very small. However, it features Marc’s most famous leading ladies and femme fatales.


[Arts] Cecilia Palmer – WTNV Fan Art


Cecilia Palmer by Spencer Richardson.

My lovely beau drew a sketch of my gender-bent vision of Cecil Palmer from Welcome to Night Vale. Expect my costume design and finished project soon!